Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Lady pAinting...

...ok I know it was really cheesy but. I love painting. Recently it's been a lot of bible versus or song lyrics but either way when I feel the need to paint, I do!
My latest two are are lady Antebellum inspired and here they are!!!
The first song is off their new album (Own the Night) and it's called "Singing Me Home." My roommate and I are planning to try and see them when they come to Missouri. Drive up early, hang out in Branson, so to the show in Springfield and drive home! Totally do able right?! Anyway, the second one is one of my all time favorite Lady A songs, "American Honey." I have one more Lady A painting that I did to "Hello World" which gives me chills every time but I don't have a picture of it.
I could (and frequently do) listen to them on repeat all day. From the itunes session to Own the Night and even hidden songs I've found like "Emily," "I Was Here," and of course their "alter ego" Lady Haze! Anyway, that's my rant of my obsession for Lady A and hopefully I'll be able to see them soon!!!!!

 and for your listening pleasure.....

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

I'm starting to get use to this place...

you know when (pt 2)

... you are confused beyond belief
... you can't stop smiling
... all you can do is laugh
... slight shaking and giggling come as a package
... you start to think beyond what you thought yesterday
... you can't wait til next time
... you start to realize you're worth it
... nothing starts turning into something
... all you want to do is dance
... you wonder where this even came from
... singing becomes part of your daily routine
... you are scared out of your mind but you just don't care

It's a good place to be. But go slow. Guard your heart. And be so lost in God that whatever is causing all the smiling, laughing and dancing has to seek Him full heatedly to find the rest of what they are looking for.

Monday, November 21, 2011

you know when...

.... you try your hardest to keep things under control and you can't. 
.... you smile all day and act like you got it all together but you really want to scream.
... your friends are bolder than you are and try to "help" by doing things you are to chicken to follow through with
... it would just be easier if he was just another tool bag
... you're making up excuses for things that you can't even justify any more. 
... you secretly are excited about where things can go but are too proud to admit it's really what you want.
... a simple smile makes you weak at the knees
.... things have gone wrong for so long so the minute something starts to go right you just wish it would keep going wrong because the possibility of something working out in your favor is scares the living @*^$^ out of you
... you want it so bad but you don't think you deserve it
... you want it so bad but you don't think they would ever want you
... you're afraid.

That's when God takes your life and shakes it like a snow globe with you trapped inside a whirlwind of water, glitter and fake snow and he's shaking it so hard that you keep hitting your head on the sides of the glass and the little castle trapped inside with you and then all of a sudden.... it stops shaking and every piece of fake snowfalls perfectly and the water is like an early morning on the lake and somehow things are just perfect. 

Sunday, November 20, 2011

I am my biggest fear

Literally, I think I scare myself more than anything else in this world. Even snakes. Which I will say spending the summer in the north hills of lovely Georgia where the humid heat of the deep south brought out a good plethora of rattlers, copperheads and water moccasin's helped me a little in getting use to God's worse idea ever but they still make me want to cry. But even after all that, I think I take the cake of my own biggest fear.
The way my mind races sometimes and causes me to do things before actually thinking about anything that is going on freaks me out. Sometimes I can catch myself but most of the time it's sitting there thinking after the fact "not your best move Jill."
Why can't I think of that BEFORE I want to dig a whole of embarrassment and bury myself alive in it?
I think of the worse and always focus on the future...the not anywhere near future... rather than being concerned with where I am now. Today. This minute in time.
Last night was fun. It was a much needed night out with two of my best girl friends at a concert on the wonderful River Market in Little Rock. We jammed out to some Hunter Hayes and watched at our beloved Razorbacks got moved to the #3 seat in country (not to mention watching the Ducks loose is always a good time in my book) and had a great time. But something else happened last night that threw me for a loop. I won't go into detail as to really what it was because well, personally it doesn't need to be broadcasted over the internet but the lesson behind that I am ok with I think.
I am fairly confident in who I am, how I look and who God made me to be in my heart and my appearance. Especially being a girl, feeling confident in how you look and going as far as to say "I think I am pretty" is flat out hard to do. Let's face it, most of us are insecure about our bodies and when we admit that we like how we look there are some people that take it as being conceded and full of ourselves. But just when you think you are ok and you are worth something and worth someone .... something else happens that makes you second guess everything you just gained. You doubt yourself and second guess who you are and forget that who you are the princess you were made to be is determined by God and nothing else. And no ONE else for that matter.
I forgot this last night. I wish I didn't but I did. I couldn't even focus on enjoying the concert to the fullest because I was so distracted and forgetting that I am worth it. That is why I scare myself.
Girls please do not loose focus on who you are and what you are made to be.

"There is no fear in love but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment and whoever fears has not been perfected in love." 1 John 4:7-21

Here's some Hunter Hayes since y'all couldn't be at the concert with me :) 

Til the next new day ♥ ,

Thursday, November 3, 2011

My first dance!!!!

     Most of you know that I love line dancing. and if you didn't, well you do now! But i am proud to say that I just finished choreographing my own! I'm pretty proud of it too. It's fun, flirty and room for variations! It's to Luke Bryan's "Country Girl" and I will hopefully post a video soon so y'all can learn it and teach it to others because Eagles can always use another dance and Bushwackers needs to do something other than The Wobble when that song comes on. I love the Wobble but it does NOT belong in my country bar!